This here is an example of patriarchy hurting everyone. This fools the male friend into thinking there must be something romantic there when there is not. So women do it for their romantic partners and their friends and expect a male friend to do it for them the same as a female friend would.
But women think that’s what a friend does. So this disconnect men are suffering from is that they think that only a person who is having sex with you will share their emotions and expect support. To women, what friendship is is someone who listens to all your problems and keeps you company. If you can’t lean on her when you’re weak, she’s not your friend. However, since women are not socialized to fear sharing these things, women’s friendships with other women are heavily based on emotional support. So men need to have a woman in their lives to have anyone they can share their emotional needs and vulnerabilities with. Men use alcohol to be able to lower their inhibitions enough to expose themselves emotionally to other men, but if you can’t get emotional support unless you’re drunk, you have a problem. Bonding with other men is done at a more superficial level involving fun group activities and conversations about general subjects but rarely involves actually leaning on other men or being really honest about emotional problems. So there’s a known thing in the study of human psychology/sociology/what-have-you where men are known to, on average, rely entirely on their female romantic partner for emotional support. Oh my God this actually explains so much.
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